Here a Swan, There a Swan, Everywhere a Swan, Swan

By Tiber

Now that I don’t have a job, I find myself spending an increasing amount of time online reading about people who do.

Evidently, there are all sorts of jobs out there that require no more than what you already have going for you and they pay!

The most recent job that I heard about was swan counter for the British royal family. Since the 12th century, all mute swans along a portion of the river Thames technically belong to the monarch so I guess if that were you, you’d want to know how many swans you had too.

And, of course, that requires a swan counter.

I can count. I can recognize a swan. I want this job!

Then I read on and discovered it was a little more complicated. It actually involves catching and marking the swans so I could already see this not working out.

I had been hoping I could just point at them and go, “One, two, three, four…”

I have a hard enough time getting a dog to come to me, much less something less domesticated, less willing and possessing a wingspan that can club you to death.

So Offical Royal Swan Counter is out. And it would have looked so good on my resume.

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