Our maze eats another one

By Tiber

We had a little excitement the other night when one of our guests, a guy named Wade, went missing. With so many rooms in this house, I guess it’s surprising that it doesn’t happen more often.

Everybody spread out to look for Wade, first covering all of the first floor and then moving upstairs. The staff even searched in their wing and Mom proceeded up to the big attics.

She opened a door on the left and jumped back. There was an unknown, old woman in there, sitting in an armchair, next to a lamp, reading. She looked so comfortable that Mom, whose house it is, was the one taken off-guard and she was the one who politely excused herself and left.

We still don’t know who this woman was. She could still be living up there, for all we know.

One thing this discovery did, however, was to even out our count.  We may have been down one person but here we’d located a new one. Wade’s wife was pretty adamant, though, unreasonably I thought, about our actually finding her husband and not just substituting him with somebody else. So the quest for Wade continued.

Once we’d all regrouped, we realized that one of our search-party couples had also not rejoined us.  Great. Now, even if we could have convinced Wade’s wife to accept the old woman in the attic, we were still down two.

Thankfully, this couple was quickly discovered when someone heard their faint yells. It turned out the two of them had peered into the silver vault, looking for Wade, but Brunty, our butler from another planet, had mistaken them for burglars. He’d pushed them into the vault all the way, then locked the door to await security, quickly forgetting to call security at all.

Eventually, we found Wade too. He’d been walking outside and had accidentally made a wrong turn and ended up deep in the hedge maze which is really dark at night, without the lights on. People tend to panic in there.

A couple of guests happened to walk past it and one of them did an impression of Jack Nicholson. And Wade somehow managed to instantly vault over the top of one of the maze’s nearly 10 foot high walls.

Too many people have seen “The Shining.” It’s what gets them nervous and lost in the maze in the first place.

I give the movie credit, though. Evidently, it’s the one thing that can also get them out.

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